Mr NYC in Disneyworld

In the Islamic religion, Muslims make a pilgrimage to Mecca in Saudi Arabia to see the Dome of the Rock; in Catholicism, the devout go to Rome to see the Pope give his weekly blessings and audiences at the Vatican; Jews head to the Wailing Wall in Israel and stuff letters into it; and in China, citizens make a pilgrimage to Beijing, laying flowers before the open glass coffin in Tiananmen Square where Chairman Mao lies pickled and wrapped in the hammer & sickled Communist flag.

And in America, we all at some point either make a pilgrimage to Disneyworld in Orlando, Florida or act alternatively embarrassed or proud of the fact that we haven't.

Well, yours truly finally made that great pilgrimage with the family in tow, where we spent five days in the Magic Kingdom and EPCOT, standing on very, very, very long lines, going on some fun rides, seeing some cool stuff, and soaking up the pure Americana of the place.

In the Magic Kingdom, we took the Walt Disney Railroad around the park, also going on the Jungle Cruise and the Pirates of the Caribbean ride, doing one rollercoaster on the Big Thunder Mountain Railroad, enjoying the privacy of Tom Sawyer Island, then seeing the Hall of Presidents show, taking another cruise on the Liberty Square Riverboat, getting spooked at the Haunted Mansion, spinning around on the Prince Charming Regal Carrousel and Dumbo the Flying Elephant and the Mad Tea Party teacups, taking more cruises on "it's a small world" and the Liberty Square Riverboat, then racing around the Tomorrowland Speedway (twice), and getting shuttled around the Tomorrowland Transit Authority People Mover.

Two highlights of our time in the Magic Kingdom: we saw the Monsters, Inc Laugh Floor where an audience is brought into a live animated show where the Monsters, Inc characters tell lots joke, some of them submitted by the audience. Two jokes were chosen from the audience and one of them was from my daughter! Her humor is now officially IP owned by the Disney Corporation. So proud! Then, one night for dinner, we ate on Easter Night at "Be Our Guest", a Beauty and the Beast themed restaurant which is a massive, cavernous space of four rooms made to look like the interiors of French palaces, and where the Beast walks around. It's totally surreal -- made even more surreal by the fact that we were still eating at 9 PM when the nightly fireworks show started and the restaurant was right next to ground zero for it and it sounded like we were being bombarded by artillery shells during dinner. The meals at "Be Our Guest" or prixe fix and comes with a very cool desert trio where you can paint your own cup (made out of white chocolate) and also "try the grey stuff" that, as the lyric goes, "is delicious."

We also saw the Carousel of Progress which was originally staged at the 1964 World's Fair in Flushing, Queens -- and my mother informs me that she originally saw it there too!

In EPCOT (which stands for Experimental Prototype Community of Tomorrow), we enjoyed seeing the various "nations" which usually consist of replicas of buildings from them like a Mexican Inca palace (that includes the Three Caballeros water ride), Reflection of China (a temple), and Canada Far and Wide (a 360 degrees show about how big and gorgeous Canada is), plus many others. Easily the best two rides we took were at EPCOT, and they couldn't have been more different: the first was Remy's Ratatouille Adventure which is an amazing 3D ride where you rush around the floor of the restaurant in the movie -- just like Remy! -- and people constantly try (and fail) to catch you; the ride includes changes in temperature (like when you're near a stove) as well as smellovision, where the delicious scent of baguettes hits your nostrils quite strongly. It's an amazing experience, well worth the 90 minute wait. The other was a much more genteel, but beautiful ride, called Living with the Land which is a tour through greenhouse and fish hacheries -- Disneyworld actually grows of a lot of their own herbs and veggies, as well their own fish, that's served in various Disneyworld restaurants. They even do work with the FDA that has a presence at EPCOT. Also, on our last night, we had another French-theme dinner at a place called Chefs de France that had very good food in "bistro."

And we went back and forth from our hotel and EPCOT via the Skyliner, a vast array of airborne cable cars that fly you over Disneyworld and provide you with spectacular views. Given how high up we were, and that these skyliners are pure glass, my kids handled our trips on them very well.

Disneyworld is so huge it's impossible to see all of it on one trip. In addition to the Magic Kingdom and EPCOT, there's also the Animal Kingdom and Hollywood Studios, as well as beaches and malls and yacht clubs. The best reason to visit Disneyworld is simply to marvel at the sheer audacity of the place, the fact that one company, lead by one man, dreamed this place up -- this artificial city that arose sphinxlike out of the Central Florida swampland almost 50 years ago. It's a pure American invention, a cathedral of entrepreneurial hutzpah -- a reminder of how Disney has impacted our culture to an incalculable degree and that Walt Disney is one of the most important Americans who ever lived.

And Disneyworld does provide a beautiful vision for American cities that I wish existed everywhere "across the the fruited plane": free public transportation, walkable streets, plentiful bathrooms and water fountains, no guns, and clean streets. Plus we got lucky -- despite the rain, it wasn't too hot.

So I suggest that all New Yorkers, like so many Americans, make the pilgrimage to Disneyworld to see something amazing.