Tuesday, August 14, 2018

"They're all drinking, thinking that they've got it made ..."

Thus crooned Bob Dylan in his masterpiece song "Like a Rolling Stone."

And this post is (partly) about drinking: specifically, Four Loko, the once-upon infamous energy/alchohol drink that burned hot and fast in 2010 and then was outlawed (it was literally killing kids). Okay, it wasn't really outlawed (it was required to change its formula) but it ceased to be the dangerous, exciting beverage that shot you with energy and got you wasted at the same time.

If you want to read all about the history of Four Loko (and who doesn't?), read this.

I never drank Four Loko but I remember, as a kid and a teenager, the twin phenomena of Jolt Cola ("All the sugar, twice the caffeine!") and Zima (the clear alcoholic beverage that tasted like bitter Mountain Dew). Oh man, did we kids think we was raging when we pounded back the Jolt and chugged the Zima! (If you were hanging around Central Park or Riverside Park late one night in 1994 or 1995, you probably saw me and my dopey friends drinking this crap). We were such a bunch of nerds who thought consuming this hyped-up stuff somehow made us bad ass. It's not surprising then that some folks would think to combine high-caffeine with booze for the ultimate "get blazed" drink. Glad I never tried it. I learned my lesson in giving into hype.

And speaking about rolling stones, speaking about REAL cool dudes ... here's what Lester Bangs thought about the greatest band in history back in 1980 and what Ronnie Wood was up to in 1987. 

I somehow doubt that Lester Bangs or Ronnie Wood or any of the Rolling Stones ever drank Jolt, Zima or Four Loko because they were probably too busy being, you know, actually cool (except for Lester, who was already dead).

"How does it feel?"



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