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Tuesday, August 15, 2017
Vanishing New York & Mr NYC -- Blogs of a Feather
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Is NYC Tyrannical?
What a tool. What an utter tool.
In fact, his theory was so dumb that Conor himself basically retracted it a week later in a piece called "The Tyranny of New York Revisited" where he calls his initial idea "flawed." Basically, he revised thesis goes, wouldn't it be nice if there was some other American town that could hold its own against NYC? And isn't it a crying shame that there isn't? Yes, that would be so lovely, Conor, I'm sure you're the first person to have thought of it.
You gotta read these two very stupid pieces by this very stupid man -- if you can, if you dare -- in order to see how embarrassingly dumb someone can be who thinks he is smart. It proves that anyone, really, can get published (particularly in a respectable publication like The Atlantic) if they have the right connections, know the right people, kiss the right tuchus, etc.
Woody Allen was right: Conor's writing proves that there really is such a thing as "mental masturbation." I'll be the first to admit that Mr NYC (like all blogs) is basically a big act of mental masturbation but at least no one pays me to do it like Conor or that kid in "Boogie Nights"! Egads.
Look, Conor, and all you NYC "playa hateas": my city, my hometown, is not tyrannical. It is, quite simply, one of a select few of the great cities of the world, up there with London, Paris, Rome, Moscow, Beijing, and Tokyo. It's really big, really rich, really exciting, and really complex because it attracts amazing people from all over America and the world. They come here because it encapsulates everything that's so great about America and these are the people that make it so great. NYC is a place where dreams come true, always has been, always will be.
"If you can make it here" and so on.
Some of you might say hey, Mr NYC, why are you taking this so personally? He's just a jackass (and he certainly is) so why do you care? Well, it's simple really: you attack my city, you attack me. I don't care if you're an Arab terrorist or a douche writing for The Atlantic.
But it goes deeper than that and it's more sinister. It's part of what I call a "red state narcissism", a belief that big cities are somehow "un-American." I really resent this. Big cities are the most American places in America because, you know what, they have more Americans in them! Conor reminds me of people like Sarah Palin who not only knock big cities and praise small towns but also use derisive terms like "liberal elitists", "illegal aliens", and "welfare recipients", etc. Let me clear up something right now:
Welfare recipients = black people
Illegal aliens = Spanish people and other swarthy foreigners
Liberal elitists = Jews.
And being a white person I know my own kind very well and can tell you that this is what people like Conor and Sarah mean when they use terms like this or trash places like NYC as being "tyranical. NYC and cities like it, as well as the people who live in them, make white people feel insecure and threatens their position of privledge. I mean, after all, the president is black -- what do these white folks have left if not there own sense of their own superiority?
So, in closing, I will simply say this: NYC is not tyrannical. It's just a great place. And lots of people know this and "want to be a part of it." I'm not even saying it's the greatest place in the world -- it's just one of them. And if people like Conor have a problem with that, well, tough noogies.
Friday, December 8, 2023
Remembering Joey in Astoria
When this blog debuted in 2007 blogs were just starting to become a Thing.
By this time of the mid-aughts most people had gained access to high-speed Internet, but most people did not have the time, money, or energy to create totally original websites for themselves. So blogs filled the void since they were these templated and easy to create, easy to manage homepages.
Blogs at the time were competing for attention with the early versions of social media like Friendster and MySpace but they were primitive and cumbersome to use. Eventually, of course, Facebook conquered them, exploding in popularity and usage. Twitter came along on its heals and provided a more efficient, more public way for people to communicate with the world.
So blogs receded.
They were, and still are, around -- like this one! -- but there are way fewer of them and get much less traffic. Their day has passed.
During this aughties blog boom, however, there were a variety of blogs devoted to NYC, some that I even interviewed their creators about. (Some lasted longer than others, although few have lasted or been this active as this one!)
One such blog at this time was called Joey in Astoria, and it was so popular and active that it even got regular media attention (unlike this one!). It debuted in 2005 and published hundreds and hundreds of posts until, in June 2010, it just ... stopped ... and ... never blogged again.
The blog did not, and does not, explain its long radio silence. It has simply remained dormant for 13 years. It's the digital equivalent of a deep freeze, something stuck in time in an eternal present with no growth towards or expectations of the future. It simply exists ... neither changing or improving or decaying just ... there ...
I hope when the day comes that I decide to end Mr NYC that I will post a final valedictory statement, a fond farewell. I certainly plan to do so unless the tentacles of cirumstance snap me up and keep me seperated from a keyboard with Internet access.
So if this blog ever ends like Joey in Astoria you'll know that life simply overwhelmed me. Otherwise, one day, I will give you all a heartfelt goodbye.
Saturday, November 13, 2010
Interview: Simone Grant of "Sex, Lies & Dating in the City"
Few, however, has done it with such originality as Simone Grant of the intriguingly named blog Sex, Lies & Dating in the City. Her blog might be called the first Web 3.0 dating blog, where she not only tells her own dating stories but also conducts polls of her readers on their dating stories/advice and directs them to products that might make their love lives a little spicier. Simone was kind enough to share her thoughts of sex, love and dating in the city and what makes her blog so unique.
There are lots of dating/sex/relationship blogs out there but yours is a little different than most. Tell us about what makes it so unique and why you named it "Sex, Lies & Dating in the City"?
Well, to be fair, I'm sure every one's blog is unique in some way.
You like to poll your readers about various aspects of their love lives. What inspired you to create these polls and what do they tell you about your readers?
So what does Simone Grant look for in a guy? Has your blog affected your love life in any way?
A question about blogs in general: you seemed to have turned your blog into a successful business. What advice can you give to other aspiring bloggers to do the same?
Tell us something about Simone Grant that we don't know.
Thanks Simone!
Monday, August 29, 2016
The Future Always Wins
- The Stork Club, the place where Walter Winchell once ruled, making and
unmaking reputations with his powerful newspaper column, is fondly
remembered.
- Television, specifically local television, which used to set the agenda
for the city in a way it rarely does today, is also being recalled. Back in the day, a TV anchor named Bill Boggs was one of the most important people in town and these days he's reminiscing about it.
- Local businesses, stores that served the community while also making a
profit, are vanishing. This article is about TekServe, the Chelsea Mac
service store, that I used to go to many times back in the day and that was a staple of NYC life, has closed down. This one really hurts because, as the writer of this article notes, this closure is another "downside to the city’s real estate boom. It’s driving away the unique, friendly
places that make living in the city worth the effort ... [a]
rapid deterioration of the city’s street-level fabric."
- Here's one counterfactual: Chumley's is coming back. The old speakeasy that closed in 2007 after an industrial accident is set to re-open soon. I remember going there many years ago and loving it -- but this resurrected saloon just won't be the same, it simply can't be. Times may heal wounds but it doesn't fully obliterate them.
- The Bowery Boys are a couple of guys with a long-running, very
successful podcast about the history of NYC. Now they have a book out,
about "adventures in old New York."
- Even porn is getting in on the act! Yes, pornography is now a nostalgic reference point for NYC. Check out the Rialto Report, a comprehensive website, blog, and archive about the adult scene in NYC back in the 1960s, 70s, and 80s. For a subject matter that is so naughty, this is an incredible elegant and beautifully presented site that makes art and history out of something lots of people consider simply obscene. And it's history alright -- an incredible history that you won't learn about in school or museums.
Loving the past and trying to remember it should never be the same as hating the future and seeking its destruction. Trump/Clinton, Brexit, terrorists, pointless TV show and movie reboots, etc. etc. do nothing, ultimately, to make us feel better. They don't bring the past back. They can't! They are, to varying degrees, acts of desperation, a metaphorical lashing out at our present (obviously TV/movie reboots are not as awful as Donald Trump nor are either as awful as terrorists but I hope you get the drift). The brilliant comedian Marc Maron recently said on his podcast, specifically about the 2016 election but also, I think, about this larger issue of fearing the future:
"It’s a tragedy that there’s so much desperation ... How do you relieve that desperation, that anger, that hopelessness? ... Here’s why people vote for Trump: ‘Fuck It!’ ‘Fuck It All!’ That’s got to be the rationale ... It's the possible annihilation of all progress with no real plan."
And that's ultimately the problem: people want to "annihilate progress" that they feel has hurt them but, for the most part, people have no idea what to replace it with except with some gauzy nostalgia. The Trump candidacy is a perfect, almost frightening example of this: he promises to "make America great again" and "bring the jobs back" and "restore law and order" -- but how? How will we be great again in way that we aren't now? What jobs are coming back? Law and order -- believe it or not but our country has never been this safe! Again, he plays on our anxieties about the present and our fears about the future by invoking a past that will never return. And here's the rub - that past was never that great to begin with.
Do you want to go back to a world where gays were closeted? Where minorities were openly discriminated against? Where smoking was tolerated everywhere? Where women were raped and the men who did it got away? Where there was no Internet? Where people who were born into poverty stayed there. Do you really truly want to return to that world? Not me.
But at the same time part of me does. Part of me wants to go back and relive those supposedly simpler times. Part of me, a big part of me, fears the future. But the future is coming, it's always coming. The future always wins even as we strive to beat it. So let's get ready for it and work to make it better. Not destroy it -- or think we can replace it with the past.
As the great American author Scott Fitzergerald wrote: "So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessy into the past."
Sunday, December 4, 2011
Transit Tidbits
Yet two stories this weekend highlight a couple of interesting developments in the never ending saga of NYC transit.
Friday, November 8, 2019
Is Mr NYC Rude Enough?
That got me thinking. Would this blog get more traffic, get more hits, be more popular, even get some kind of media attention, if it was really really mean? If, instead blogging about the spirit and psyche of this town, I "went medieval" of people and said nasty stuff about them and just became, quite frankly, another digital prick? Or, as Mick Jagger might croon: "Ain't I hot enough? Ain't I rough enough? Ain't I rich enough?"
Well, I can answer the last one - I ain't rich enough but, for the last two, I'll let you, the dear readers, to decide.
Wednesday, July 18, 2018
Interview: Amy Sohn, NYC Columnist & Novelist
Wednesday, June 8, 2022
NYC Scrapbooking
At the risk of being gauche, allow me to quote myself: a couple of years ago I described this blog as a "pastiche" or "a collage, a repository for memories, a collection of favorite things, a funhouse of nostalgia, a love letter to the past and future, a work of art, a self-contained world that invites you to visit a while and become absorbed in."
You might also call it a scrapbook.
In its way, Mr NYC is a digital scrapbook, roughly defined as a document of precious memories, a collection of souvenirs and mementos, and an opportunity to channel one's inner artist.
Scrapbooks need not be literal books full of pieces of paper and objects of one's past or journey thru life. They can be, more metaphorically speaking, things like diaries or autobiographies or videos -- or blogs like this one -- anything that captures and makes sense of the past and provides tea leaves for the future.
I recently encountered two examples of metaphorical scrapbooking, both of which fascinate me: a new exhibit about Lou Reed at the NYPL that is a collection of his papers, recordings, and various nickknacks, showing the work and evolution of this great and influential NYC musician; and a new novel by, of all people, the actor David Duchovny that is based on his memories of growing up in NYC.
This exhibit and this novel are, in a way, scrapbooks of these two very different NYC artists -- as is this humble blog.
When Anne Frank wrote her diary hiding out in that apartment in Amsterdam or when Marco Polo dictated his memories of China while literally imprisoned, these two people who would otherwise be lost to history instead were made immortal. They told their stories, they recorded and "scrapbooked" their lives, and in doing so not only made us better understand their times and adventures (told both from the perspective of two people who were literally trapped) but made us understand that the world was a greater place, and the human spirit more indomitable, than we could ever imagine.
Scrapbooking is a great start.
Saturday, November 17, 2007
Interview: Michael Musto of "La Dolce Musto"
Michael's been writing his Village Voice column "La Dolce Musto" for more than two decades. He's appeared on PBS, NPR, E! Entertainment Television, and MSNBC (amongst many other media outlets), and although he's got a national presence, Michael's never strays from his New York state of mind.
Michael was kind enough to share a few thoughts with Mr NYC readers about gossip, New York City, and bloggers.
How long have you lived in NYC and been writing "La Dolce Musto"?
I've lived in New York my entire life. I couldn't exist anwhere else. I don't drive and I'm allergic to too much sun--or at least to people who stay out in too much sun. I've been writing the column for at least 20 years. My first column was in hieroglyphics, ba dum pum.
What made you, an Ivy League graduate, want to become a gossip writer?
Even at Columbia, I mainly cared about gossiping about my dormmates and buzzing about Cher's latest hairstyles (in between studying The Iliad, of course), so it all made sense to me. Gossip is what I do best. It deflects attention from myself and onto others who live in a faster lane while at the same time, ironically enough, getting me some attention as well.
Tell us briefly about the art of gossip writing. What makes one a good gossip writer? Who influenced you?
Gossip writing should be fair (there are two sides to every story), yet a bit jaundiced, so your eyebrow is always raised in response to the p.r. hype machine. It should also be carried on with an underlying sense that none of this stuff really matters much--not in the larger picture--yet it's all important because we care about it passionately and guilty pleasures should not be ignored. A gossip writing style should be bold, personal, individual, and opinionated. Through the years, I've been influenced by Tom Wolfe, Rex Reed, Truman Capote, Liz Smith, Cindy Adams, and many others.
What are your favorite "gossipy" things to cover?
A walking train wreck like a Lindsay/Britney/Paris is fun to cover because their entire careers seem to consist of providing great tabloid copy. Plus I like what they do careerwise--Lindsay's a terrific movie star, Britney puts out really fun music, and Paris has a certain poise, even with egg on her face. She's telegenic and in fact so seemingly blank you can project whatever you want onto her and put her in any medium you like.
Who are your favorite people to cover? What makes a person good gossip fodder?
I'll cover anyone on the way up or the way down. These are the people who are desperate for press, so the'll say anything to get into your column. Once they're on top, they're generally too guarded by p.r. watchdogs to say anything interesting. I also like anyone who will provide conflict and good copy. "I hate my costar" is much more interesting than "My newest sequel was a labor of love."
What was your biggest scoop or most exciting thing you covered?
I was the first to run the details of the murder of drug dealer Angel Melendez by club kid king Michael Alig and his roommate Freeze. It was truly grisly, from the Drano injection to the smothering by pillow. I also was ahead of the curve on outing people like Rosie and Ellen, who weren't thrilled, but who ultimately came out with a vengeance and left me behind to out others. It was exciting to push buttons and go where no one was going at the time. Huge magazine profiles of Rosie were portraying her as an ambiguous single mom with a crush on Tom Cruise!
Did you really coin the term "Celebutard?" Please give us a brief definition.
I said the word on Countdown with Keith Olbermann and it somehow went into my Wikipedia profile as having been coined by me. I'll take credit, if they want to give it, but I can't say for sure if I coined it. On other sites, I've been credited with everything from being a martial arts expert to having written a movie starring Jayne Mansfield, so don't believe everything you read (except my column).
In many ways gossip columnists were the original bloggers. Are blogs and bloggers a threat to gossip columnists?
I feel like my column was the original blog. It consists of my wicked, personal thoughts and opinions interspersed (one hopes) with information and insight. The advent of actual blogs has been threatening to columnists, but I feel it's a welcome burst of energy that forces us to work harder and dig deeper to compete. And at least we get paid for it!
What do you love about NYC? How has the city changed in the years you've lived here?
New York has lost much "edge"--God, I hate that word--ever since Giuliani made it a giant Disneyland for tourists and rich people, but I feel those who fled in horror are complete wusses. I stayed and continue to find fringey nightlife and wacky people living on the precipice. I'd rather celebrate them than give up and move to San Diego just because you get a terrace there.
Is NYC still a great place for gossip?
Yes, it's great. L.A. has more celebrities per square mile--you can't even go into a 7/11 without running into a Pamela Lee--but here we have theater, movies, music, nightlife, everything, and it's all on a somewhat higher level.
Tell us something about Michael Musto we don't know.
He's actually a nice guy. Now THAT'S shocking!
Thanks Michael!
Check out La Dolce Musto every week in the Village Voice.
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Interview: Suzannah B. Troy
On YouTube, on her blog, and in the streets, Suzannah shines a bright light on things that the powers-that-be in this town would prefer you not notice: community destroying development, the vanishing middle class, official negligence, and the political cronyism that enables it.
Needless to say, the big media in NYC does its best to ignore people like Suzannah so Mr NYC decided to see if Suzannah would share her thoughts on these topics and she happily obliged. The interview is below:
You're an artist and outspoken political activist. Tell us a little about yourself and what fuels your art and activism.
I found the "on switch" when NYU targeted St. Ann's at 120 East 12th Street. I urge people to pass by and see the new hideous mega dorm. The facade from 1847 is still there fronting yet another zone busting mega-dorm. NYU mega-dormed the East Village to death.
I got the Parks department to return bathroom doors to the women's bathroom in Tompkins and DOT wrote me in response to passionate letters and a drawing of Alfredo Feliciano asking for two speed bumps for schools on the Lower East Side. A public member of the community board told me I would never get them. I have a letter from DOT stating they are coming and thanking me for caring about school safety.
Bottom line: write the city directly, write the newspapers, make YouTubes and band together.
I am part of a group Fed Up New Yorkers that fought Bloomberg and we wanted to hire a bus and drive from borough to borough protesting no third term. Judging by how close the election was I am sad we never got the bus!
Bloomberg's soul crushing tsunami of community crushing development really got me started using the term activist and take action.
How long have you lived in NYC and what makes you take such a big interest in the city's fate?
A big part of my family was born here including my maternal Grandfather on Ludlow Street in 1904. To have me they moved across the border to NJ and I moved back to the city in 1984. I have lived the most years of my life here. When I was six weeks old we moved to England for a year. I've lived there two years.
My first apt was an illegal sublet on Carmine St. Her rent was 100 dollars and she charged me 350.
I picked the Village because there were very few tall buildings and the light was spectacular. I loved how it was truly a village. I love the buildings, even the trees and nature seem beautiful and rebellious. I love the NY character and characters. I am one and I am sure you are. I love the passion.
Like you, I'm concerned that NYC is turning into a bland playground for the rich, squeezing out the middle and working classes. What do you think can be done to turn this around?
Bloomberg and socialite mega-millionaire city planner Amanda the peoples' Burden have crushed this city with reckless development fueled by the very same stupidity and greed that brought down this city.
It truly may take a revolution to turn this city around. If not a revolution than new dynamic leaders that truly care about the people. Benjamin Lesser of The New York Daily News wrote some articles that exposed city council members including Christine Quinn getting kickbacks aka campaign donations from developers.
New leadership, reform or a revolution...
You're a ubiquitous presence on the web and YouTube. Tell us how many blogs, websites, and YouTube videos you have, and how you use digital technology in your art and activism.
Short answer: a lot. All 334 YouTubes were removed before the election or theft of a third term by king Mike for 28 hours. Many activists spoke up on my behalf and Norman Siegel represented me.
Google wrote me an apology.
I use my IPhone and film as events unfold and post immediately to YouTube from the street.
The Villager and NYU hosted the debate between Christine Quinn and her opponents. Somehow magically Quinn's people all got to the front of the line and in. The Villager turned away the press including NY1. They told NY1 you had to stand in line with everyone else. I caught [them] turning away a senior citizen, long term community member who made an Olympic effort to get there in a wheel chair. Norman Siegel, I and some really dynamic activists fought hard and eventually we got him in. Huffington ran a piece on it. The IPhone described in the article as NYU's public relation nightmare is mine.
The associate editor Lincoln Anderson of The Villager sent me all these emails harassing me. I had told him to leave me alone and he didn't. I filed an aggravated harassment complaint.
The Villager and NYU backed Quinn who sold out to developers and Mike Bloomberg. John Sexton of NYU ran down to testify [that] Mike Bloomberg must have a third term. Sure, Mike and Amanda Burden care more about students than they do about New Yorkers.
The voters sent a message to Mike. The most humiliating and expensive win. It was proof we can't rely on newspapers and we have to take to the streets with video, go to churches, community centers, make YouTubes, blog because the media, even most little rags, are owned by developers or mega rich in bed with Bloomberg.
The night of the election they finally had to go off script and report the truth ... the election was too close to call.
Could you imagine is the press had given protesters some coverage, ditto for Tony Avella and Bill Thompson?
Mike Bloomberg barely won. The next morning I was receiving calls congratulating me.
You protested at Mayor Bloomberg's latest inauguration. What other kinds of protests and activity have you done and what advice can you give to other aspiring political activists?
I answered some of this already like getting bumps that DOT has promised to install by two schools not that far from where the tenement house were my Grandfather was born.
I have been urged to keep making my YouTubes even though I have to admit I am exhausted. My newest slams Mike for burdening tax payers to what The New York Post estimates is 2 million dollars to hire his campaign staff when he should and could have payed out of pocket. It is criminal to do vanity hires for his legacy when he is closing homeless shelters, firehouses, libraries, schools and laying off people! So I got on YouTube and made a series.
Many New Yorkers don't have computers so you have to get out on the streets to get your message out.
The city has a tremendously rich history of dynamic activists using every way possible to protest and I am sure the future will bring more ways that maybe we haven't begun to even fathom.
I am moved by how many hip New Yorkers bring their kids to protest. We had a stunning girl holding a protest sign at the mass eviction at 47 East 3rd Street. She is our future.
My advice is be passionate as if today is your last day on Earth because it just might be. Hold on to your passion!
What are your favorite things about NYC and your favorite places in the city?
I love what is left of the historic buildings, culture and history. I love the energy and the diverse mosaic of people. I will be in the subway crushed together with the broadest range of people, all colors, mixes, ages and I think wow they are beautiful and you won't find this mosaic in LA, Tokyo, anywhere.
Tell us something about yourself and NYC that most of us don't know.
Short answer: I did grunt work on the film Wall Street. That was not the original ending which was darker. Oliver res-hot the end which I thought was a mistake.
Long answer: after Sept 11 I can't express the pain, upset and grief but anyone here, anyone who lost someone knows the feelings.
At some point later I met this fireman that was clearly shaken. I think he had spent too much time digging in the rubble. I remember when Rudy tried to tell the FDNY they could no longer take the trucks down to pick up their guys if and when they were lucky enough to find the DNA. Of course they did go down.
He was huge! He looked like he walked out of a photo of New York firemen from the turn of the century. He was divorced, maybe six foot five and I call him Mr Heaven on Earth.
We were so sad and a service was coming up to honor a hero at St Patrick's we both knew. This guy did CPR on my soul. I am still in shock about Sept. 11 and I can't believe it happened. He was this one positive light.
I voted for Bloomberg twice and I would never vote for him again. He destroyed the city pushing massive displacement and pushing all these sky piecing mirrored buildings reflecting a history destroyed and communities no longer welcome.
I ask myself if this is another horrifying bad dream like 9-11 that I can't wake up from. I look around the city and I am shocked. It is unrecognizable, soulless, so many empty store fronts ... People have been forced out.
I do think about leaving. Reuniting with Mr Heaven on Earth or someone like him and finding some more Heaven outside NY.
I know whether I stay or go so many dynamic activists will keep on keeping on as they have before me and will after I am gone. I think of the kids that showed up with their parents to protest and truly I think a revolution maybe needed to bring change.
Thanks so much for taking the time to interview me.
Thanks! After this interview, Suzannah sent a couple of short notes which I'm happy to include here:
The air sale over St. Ann's by the USPS to NYU was illegal because the USPS never notified the State of New York as legally obligated. I called Environmental Crimes at the State Attorney General Offices and had him talk with Andrew Berman of Greenwich Village Society of Historic Preservation. He said we had a case. I gathered we needed as much money as NYU and the USPS to go after them. But still make the phone calls, leave a paper trial and blog on.
I would advise activists to seek out lawyers. Norman Siegel has been critical to me. I even discussed the law re: putting up my Mike Bloomberg King of New York Poster. I wanted to put the poster on every empty store front to highlight Mike's new NY but Norman said I could get ticketed so I turned to YouTube.
Thanks again!
Wednesday, November 20, 2019
Studio 360 New York Icons
The possibilities are endless.
May I make one suggestion to the creators of the New York Icons series? Maybe you should include blogs. And, if you're including blogs, maybe you could include, oh, I don't know, Mr NYC!
Thursday, April 3, 2008
Mr NYC Rubs Some Shoulders
Among some of the bloggers I drank and chatted with:
- The spirited creator of Debonair Debacles, a personal blog that's remarkably insightful and well-done. She talks about everything on here: herself, politics, popular culture, food, books, you name it. She told me she gets over 200 hits a day (Mr NYC is just a wee bit jealous) and you can see how she's earned it -- it's simply a delightful blog. Check it out!
- A lady who calls herself Madam Breakfast -- yes, a blog devoted to the first and most important meal of the day. Breakfast Lab is a very informative blog (about guess what) and has lots of great advice about what constitutes a healthy breakfast. I can honestly say I've never seen anything quite like it. Definitely worth a look.
- Finally, someone with not one, not two, but three advice blogs, one of them on nerve.com. They are: SelfHelpMe, Stephanerd, and the Modern Materialist. Very smart blogs, and very funny
Friday, December 19, 2008
Interview: The Dateable Dork
These movies and TV shows might be fun to watch but they sure ain't reality. The realities of dating in New York is both funnier, scarier, and a lot more complicated than any fictional rendering could ever be. And no one talks about the realities of dating in NYC better than the Dateable Dork. Her blog has to be the most honest and most hilarious forum about love and lovin' in NYC that I've ever read. With great wittiness and energy, she takes you into her life and makes you laugh and think about the craziness of love in NYC. The Dateable Dork reminds you that not all New Yorkers are characters straight out of a Candace Bushnell novel but are people who can be more interesting, more intriguing and, yes, more dorky, than anyone could imagine.
She agreed to answer my questions about what makes her a dork and why dating in NYC is a such a crazy adventure.
I have a hard time believing that any woman can really be a dork. Convince us that you're one of my breed.
You've never met a female dork? Wow, you don't know what you're missing! I really am a total dork, in all the typical ways you would imagine for a male. I'm uncoordinated, too tall, I snort when I laugh, my fashion sense is always two (or ten) seasons behind, I talk about science at cocktail parties (which never fails to get groans from the crowd), etc. The only thing I'm missing is the pair of glasses with the Band-Aid in the middle. Believe it: I'm a dork.
According to Jerry Seinfeld, 95% of all people are "un-dateable." What makes you part of the other 5%?
First of all, I love Seinfeld. Just had to get that out of the way. Despite my dorky persona, I really do think I'm totally dateable. The caveat is that I'm dateable to other dorks. I'll never get the super slick guy who dates supermodels, but for the average, normal, somewhat nerdy guy, I think I'm a great catch! I'm smart, interesting, educated, fun to be around, and I look great in heels and a miniskirt. I'm the girl you can bring home to your parents and then have all sorts of kinky sex with afterwards. I've got my shit together, I have a dorky but respectable job, and I'm not afraid to laugh at how ridiculous I am. What's not to love, really?
So tell us how your blog the Dateable Dork came to be – and why it went away and then came back (that is, if you want to tell us about that).
I started the Dateable Dork because I realized that I need an outlet for all the crazy dating drama that had completely taken over my life. I had been emailing my dating stories to my friends on a daily basis, and I think they were getting really, really sick of it. At first they were interested, but eventually I could tell that they were about to disown me or something. So I started putting all my drama out into cyberspace, and it made me and my friends much happier people.
Now... do we really want to get into "the incident?" I'll make this short and sweet: when a guy I had been dating found my blog, read all the dirty details about my dating/sex life, and dumped my ass in a raging ball of flames, I kind of went into a state of shock. It was as if my whole world had imploded. I lost a guy that had real potential, my secret identity had been discovered, and I was pretty much a total mess. I didn't know what to do... so I just deleted the whole thing. It was the only thing I could think of that made any sense.
I always knew that I'd be back ... eventually. I just needed some time to get over the shock, which (to be perfectly honest) took a lot longer than I thought it would. I spent a lot of time being sad and depressed until I finally decided that I was overreacting and needed to get over it already. And I did. I started writing again, and it made me feel so much better.
Books, TV shows, movies, and now blogs like yours have made dating in NYC a cottage industry, and it seems like finding love in this town is a frustrating, time consuming, expensive, hopelessly complex adventure in Social Darwinism. Do you agree? What are your thoughts?
Yes, I completely agree - dating in New York is very much akin to survival of the fittest. It's so hard just to come out of it in one piece! Despite all my adventures in dating, I never seem to come out of it with anything to show for myself (clearly I am not at the top of the evolutionary scale) except for credit card bills filled with cute outfits and my half of expensive dinners. But here's the thing: I have a theory about dating in New York. It's so simple, but so true. There are millions of people in this city, which you would think would make it easy to find someone. However, in reality, the abundance of available dates makes every one's standards impossibly high. I'm guilty of this myself. If you don't like someone, throw him back! There are millions of others. Too short, too tall, too much of a mama's boy? Next! Realistic standards go out the window when there are just so many people to choose from. The perfect one has got to be out there, somewhere... right?
The (sad but true) joke is that "nice guys" finish last, and it does seem like a lot of women prefer to date "bad boys" who end up making them miserable. As a woman, why do you think that is? Are most nice guys just too boring?
I don't know how much stock I take in the whole "nice guys finish last" adage. A nice guy is exactly what I'm looking for, and I think most of my single female friends would say the same. Yes, most women have that irresistible desire to hook up with a "bad boy" -- we love the taboo and the drama of it all. But we don't want to date bad boys, we just want to use them and then throw them away (sorry, boys). If I'm looking for an actual relationship, I want a nice, normal, stable, professional guy who will actually enjoy my dorky science jokes and who my mom will be crazy about. Nice guys may be more "boring" than bad boys, but "boring" is not necessarily a bad thing.
What do you, the Dateable Dork, look for in a guy – or are your standards too high?
Oh my god, my standards are way too high. I'm just as guilty of this as everyone else! Earlier this year, I wrote a post about exactly what I look for in a guy, and everyone seemed to think that it read more like a job interview than anything else. My standards are focused on narrowing down the pool of available men to those that meet my basic dating requirements. From there, I just cross my fingers and hope that the chemistry is right! "Requirements" include things like never being married before, no kids, a college degree, non-virgin, non-smoker, lives close to my apartment, and the ultimate deal breaker: does not live with parents. What's hilarious is that I actually manage to find these date-worthy men, and I still always wind up striking out! Clearly I have no idea what I'm doing and am just as hopeless as everyone else.
Your blog is very funny and has generated quite the fan base. Is being funny a help or a hindrance for you and other funny women when it comes to dating?
Hahaha, it's so strange to hear people say that I'm funny because I am so NOT funny in person! I guess it comes out in my writing but not so much in my real life. I have a weird sense of humor in person, and no one really seems to get it. Oh well. In fact, I think that if I were funnier in person, it would probably help me out in the dating world. Guys like funny chicks, right?
As for my blog generating quite the fan base ... I'm flattered, really. : ) It's amazing to me that anyone is actually interested in reading about my dating drama, but whatever, I can roll with it. I love my readers -- everyone I have encountered in the blogosphere has been totally awesome. Thanks, guys!
Tell us something about the Dateable Dork we don't know.
Hmm ... this is a tough one because I usually spill everything on my blog! Here's something that I know I've never written about - I didn't lose my virginity until age 20. I just had absolutely no interest in sex! I was so busy studying (I'm a big dork, remember?) and concentrating and being productive that sex was just not even on the radar. Sure, I dated, but I probably frustrated the hell out of all my boyfriends because I would never sleep with them. Aww, poor guys. If I only knew what I was missing.
Finally, what do you love about NYC.
Although there are endless things to love about New York, the thing I love most is that it's home. Cheesy, I know, but it's true. I love that every time I cross Houston street I think of my grandmother who grew up downtown. I love that office buildings in midtown remind me of my mom working as a secretary in the 80s -- it's all very "Working Girl." I love that some people think of Bryant Park as the home of fashion week, but I think of it as "that park where I had a great second date." It's not surprising that, after all these years, I'm still here in New York - it's home, I love it, and I'm here to stay. (Oh, and I love that New Yorkers are angry. There's nothing like some good old-fashioned angst to wake you up in the morning. Hahaha. Move aside, bitches! I'm late for work!).
Thanks Dork!